Bloomberg Enters 2020 Race due to lack of Old, White, Male Candidates

Billionaire cites a lack of mature-aged white men in pool of candidates as reason for nomination.

| Photo by Gage Skidmore

Businessman and former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg last week announced he is seeking the Democratic nomination for President in 2020 in a move that was surprising or exciting to no one.

With a net worth estimated at $58 billion, Bloomberg is the 9th richest person in the United States and the 14th richest person in the world. A long-time critic of President Trump, Bloomberg believes he is the only candidate in the current pool of Democratic nominees that stands a chance of buying more votes in the 2020 election.

“None of the other candidates have what it takes,” Bloomberg said in a recent interview. “We need to look at who’s won in the past. Excluding Obama, that was just a fluke.”

When asked how his campaign would combat the languid response from voters to his campaign, Bloomberg declined to answer, instead throwing a wad of hundred dollar bills in the air and quickly exiting the room. 

An anonymous source close to Bloomberg believes the Presidency won’t satisfy the billionaire’s sense of inadequacy. 

“The only thing that ever made Mike happy was the old sled he played with as a child,” the source told the New York Prophet. “But he sold that years ago.”

The Bloomberg campaign was contacted for comment and has not yet responded.